For your own health and well being, don’t snap it in half and put it in the pot of boiling water while standing in the kitchen with your Italian girlfriend?

So your head is stuck up your arse and you refuse to exert the effort to extract it.

God help us if the majority of the country matches your level of apathy, 'cause we’re all fucked six ways from Sunday if so.

Sure ain’t because TACO is a ballchinian, on account of having no balls at all.

“Large garden, because I love plants” equates to “I want to grow enough to feed myself” in your mind? Bit of a stretch there.