“I can’t believe how big you’ve grown, how big my perfect grandkids have grown. It’s amazing, the way that time slips away. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to come to their baseball games or your wedding, but I’m sure you understand how limited I’ve been. The unlimited package is only $49.99 per month, sweetie. You can always have me in your corner, but I can understand how an old woman like me might not be wanted there.”