this is pretty good actually
One can find someone who is their friend, is someone they love, and with whom they have a great sexual relationship but still get zoned into “it’s complicated”. If reality wasn’t so messy, and we didn’t have such fucked up childhoods, my ride or die and I would be a perfect couple. Instead we’re sometimes fuck buddies, sometimes lovers, sometimes friends, sometimes play relationship. It’s complicated.
I was curious about what it would be like to have a fuck buddy for a while to be honest, thought it would be interesting and shit, unlike one-night stands.
Anyway, humans became too terrifying and morally repugnant recently to do anything like that.
Once some minimum standards, like human rights, international law, and just basic decency is restored, once there is some actual hope for this species going into the Jetsons future, instead of blade runner, or AM, then we can talk.
You’re much more likely for this to develop organically than finding someone through an app (which I inferred would be your plan since otherwise you wouldn’t be exposed to people in general)
Mods remove. Clearly not a Shitpost.
i hate that i need to agree. the post is solid, its got to go.
Sorry but this is a trigram
it’s complicated
Not really, I love a lot of my friends. You don’t need to be a couple or family to love someone
I think love here means falling in love, in an erotic way. The broad term “love” complicates communication sometimes.
100% accurate. My wife is my best friend in the whole world.
During COVID, a lot of married couples divorced because they were forced to spend time together at home every day and realized they can’t stand being around each other so much. Going to a job every day got them out of the house and away from their spouse/family for a few hours, which made married life tolerable.
But for my wife and I, self-isolating at home was business as usual. We always hang out, even if we’re doing our own separate things. Just existing in the same space together makes us happy. Heck, we both retired young, so we’re now just sitting around the house all day long together. And we’re still enjoying each other’s friendship and love.
Find someone you can vibe with on a personal level, not just someone who’s pretty or has one or two traits you want to associate with. Marrying my best friend has been the best decision I’ve ever made and it pays out tenfold as you get older together.
Tell me about it! My spouse was pissed when they found out about my hobbies that I was doing outside of the house, like having sex with other people
I’ve worked with so many people who use their job to escape their marriage. That sucks. I love spending time with my wife. I wish we got to go do things like we used to.
Friendly reminder for my fellow aces out there that the sex circle just means compatibility not necessarily actually having sex. If both of you are cool without doing the Horizontal Mambo, then that means you fulfill the sex circle.
My wife and I have been married 8 years this July and we haven’t had sex since we conceived our twins who turn 6 this summer. I love her to bits, she’s my best friend. I’m just ace and she’s almost exclusively sexually attracted to women.
Fascinating setup. Does she have sex with women outside your marriage, if I you don’t mind me asking?
Neither of us is opposed to the idea per se, but between some issues with her health and us taking care of our kids she doesn’t really feel like looking if that makes sense?
Good, but realize there are two people, each with their own idea of which part of this diagram applies to their relationship with the other person.
P1: Love + Sex
P2: Friendship + Sex
Situationship?
P1: Love + Friendship + Sex
P2: Friendship + Sex
Unrequited Romantic Love for P1.
‘Its not that serious’ for P2.
And then this gets even more complicated when you try to account for just sexual attraction, desire to have sex with the other, but not having actually had sex yet, as a variable for both parties.
P1: Friendship
P2: Love + Desire for Sex
Clueless ‘Friend’ for P1
Limerence/Infatuation for P2
P1: Friendship + Love
P2: Friendship + Love + Desire for Sex
… Greek Tragedy.
And and, this is just for monogamous couples or pairings and doesn’t well describe polyamory, cucks, cheaters, swingers, etc.
And and and, as Macchi the Slime points out, this also is inadequate to describe asexuals aces, for whom both P1 and P2 sharing Friendship and Love constitutes a full couple relationship, potentially a perfect match, or where an ace paired with a non ace can follow different dynamics/rules.
And and and and… people habe different definitions of what constitutes ‘Friendship’ and ‘Love’, and, those definitions may change overtime, and, people may change whether or not they consider the other person a Friend or a Lover as time goes on.
In conclusion, nice try cartoon cat, humans are unfortunately considerably more complicated than that.
But you just used it as a tool to categorize and explain a wide swath of relationship dynamics. The only thing you needed was to apply it to the individuals instead of the relationship writ large.
I think the cat is in the middle of a lecture too. Maybe that’s the next slide?
I guess my point is that this is but a stepping stone to perhaps a better systemic way of trying to understand things…
… or, perhaps the fact that you have to keep complexifying and expanding on the original concept and giving it caveats and special cases… means that some other kind of fundamental approach would be superior.
I think the best way might be the simplest way that achieves a consensus that sufficient nuance is considered.
Or rather, the minimum necessary that everyone affected can use the tool proficiently to meet their needs. Most tools need regular maintenance or discarding, but cat is giving simple, so maybe cat is on to something.
Lets hear what Professor Cat has to say.
This is pretty insightful for something in Lemmy Shitpost.
If you have love and sex but not friendship, that’s just chemical addiction to your own hormones. Leave that relationship.
I’m curious what love (in the romantic sense) without friendship would even look like. That just seems like infatuation or something.
Wait, what? How can you love someone without friendship? People I care about are either friends or family. So without friendship, sex + love is just… incest?
Why is this a shitpost? I feel like it’s a wholesome meme or whatever
Idk if there’s any love without friendship between peers.
Couple Love Sex
Perfect match Love Sex
Friendship Love Sex!
Don’t love sex too much though or you might become a poor dog or cockroach in your next life.
This seems like the real shitpost
How high does one have to be to come up with this
YES
Ahh yes the Entertain Dog (homo dog) lol
