No, it’s far more than just consistency. There are many people with which a certain individual will not connect with, no matter the consistency.
Like, I get that it worked for you, and you want others to experience it as well. What you don’t appreciate is that this absolutist advice can be downright harmful. If the person hearing this advice is someone who is burnt out from trying to connect, following this advice will only burn them out more. In that case, it needs a closer look to why it’s burning them out, and what other factors may need to be looked at.
It’s one thing to say “this worked for me, and might work for you depending on your situation”, and another to say “this is always the solution, if it hasn’t worked for you yet you haven’t done it enough”. You won’t be able to properly drive a slot head screw with a Philips head screwdriver, no matter how much you try, and the answer there isn’t, “you haven’t tried enough”.
just saying, you can’t solve loneliness without going out and meeting real people. online friends help, but it’s the difference between a partner you can see, hug, do physical stuff together, and an LDR. Our brains need real human contact, an online chat Isn’t the same.
I’m horrified to be near any people, I have just developed downright anthrophobia after a while, I’m extremely messed up, and forcing me to interact with people (as my job does) only degrades me further.
No, it’s far more than just consistency. There are many people with which a certain individual will not connect with, no matter the consistency.
Like, I get that it worked for you, and you want others to experience it as well. What you don’t appreciate is that this absolutist advice can be downright harmful. If the person hearing this advice is someone who is burnt out from trying to connect, following this advice will only burn them out more. In that case, it needs a closer look to why it’s burning them out, and what other factors may need to be looked at.
It’s one thing to say “this worked for me, and might work for you depending on your situation”, and another to say “this is always the solution, if it hasn’t worked for you yet you haven’t done it enough”. You won’t be able to properly drive a slot head screw with a Philips head screwdriver, no matter how much you try, and the answer there isn’t, “you haven’t tried enough”.
that’s part of therapy and the internal work they must also do.
and “keep trying” is and will always be a much better advice than “don’t keep trying”.
Jfc, I’m not saying “don’t keep trying”. I’m saying “look at what works best for your situation”, ffs. Read what I actually wrote.
just saying, you can’t solve loneliness without going out and meeting real people. online friends help, but it’s the difference between a partner you can see, hug, do physical stuff together, and an LDR. Our brains need real human contact, an online chat Isn’t the same.
True. As soon as I go outside, my loneliness is solved, and I never want to go outside again.
it takes work, and repetition, going outside and “touching grass” is noting.
I’m horrified to be near any people, I have just developed downright anthrophobia after a while, I’m extremely messed up, and forcing me to interact with people (as my job does) only degrades me further.
i hope you figure it out, and have access to resources, like a good therapist. 🫂