I think I’m a good friend. I have a few dozen friends or so (across multiple countries that I’ve lived) and I’m a man in my 40s. Men don’t typically care about birthdays and stuff – so it’s not terribly hard. You reach out every now and again and have a chat and also when you’re in town you make time.
Whenever I plan something I try to involve them and it doesn’t happen often now that I’m a lot older. So, it’s not particularly hard.
My friends don’t always get back to me though … those that do are the ones I’ve stayed friends with.
If it’s important to you, you’ll make time. If not, you’ll make an excuse.
You say “a few dozen friends.” Do you actually consider all of them friends, or are some friends and the rest acquaintances?
I know many people that I’m friendly with through work and other places, but the majority is consider acquaintances. I also have friends, but that’s a much smaller group.
Lived in London for so long. We drink, we eat, been through stuff with them, I know partner’s names and kids names and went travelling with them. I’m closer with some than others of course, but I still consider them friends? I could be wrong? Everyone says I put in more effort than most to keep in touch and organize and all that. Since I no longer live there I don’t catch up much any more so it’s a big catch up once a year when I’m there now instead of our weekly/monthly dos.
In Canada, I have highschool friends around me and we don’t catch up as much but I still consider them friends as well. I’ve been groomsmen to their weddings and all that. We still don’t catch up like we used to but I’d like to think what’s nice is that we can tear ourselves away from our partners/family that it’s sorta like we never left. We don’t guilt each other for not catching up – but we all make the effort when we can.
I’ve lost a lot more acquaintances over time as well? Those I would say were coworkers, friends of friends or maybe friends of circumstances and all that jazz? To be clear, I am definitely extroverted.
I think I’m a good friend. I have a few dozen friends or so (across multiple countries that I’ve lived) and I’m a man in my 40s. Men don’t typically care about birthdays and stuff – so it’s not terribly hard. You reach out every now and again and have a chat and also when you’re in town you make time.
Whenever I plan something I try to involve them and it doesn’t happen often now that I’m a lot older. So, it’s not particularly hard.
My friends don’t always get back to me though … those that do are the ones I’ve stayed friends with.
If it’s important to you, you’ll make time. If not, you’ll make an excuse.
You say “a few dozen friends.” Do you actually consider all of them friends, or are some friends and the rest acquaintances?
I know many people that I’m friendly with through work and other places, but the majority is consider acquaintances. I also have friends, but that’s a much smaller group.
For the most part, I would say I do?
Lived in London for so long. We drink, we eat, been through stuff with them, I know partner’s names and kids names and went travelling with them. I’m closer with some than others of course, but I still consider them friends? I could be wrong? Everyone says I put in more effort than most to keep in touch and organize and all that. Since I no longer live there I don’t catch up much any more so it’s a big catch up once a year when I’m there now instead of our weekly/monthly dos.
In Canada, I have highschool friends around me and we don’t catch up as much but I still consider them friends as well. I’ve been groomsmen to their weddings and all that. We still don’t catch up like we used to but I’d like to think what’s nice is that we can tear ourselves away from our partners/family that it’s sorta like we never left. We don’t guilt each other for not catching up – but we all make the effort when we can.
I’ve lost a lot more acquaintances over time as well? Those I would say were coworkers, friends of friends or maybe friends of circumstances and all that jazz? To be clear, I am definitely extroverted.
Dear Lord - I can accept that! As an introvert, just reading that level of engagement was overwhelming lol.