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River Styx has been paved over so now you have to pay Caron the bus driver instead
The torture department has been outsourced and will be delivered via zoom. Please make sure your laptop is plugged in and your camera is working prior to the next millennium.
Hell just turns the fires down for a brief moment now because refrigeration is expensive.
Also, the Groundhog can no longer be observed by the public because his lawyer said it was a hostile work environment.