Lemon is right…but not because they have medical problems. I’m left as hell but I’d get so annoyed if an interview candidate snapped back like that. I’d think “this person is going to escalate any minor inconvenience”
It depends, I know people that would be glad to help on the work but will not tolerate out of work pondering. Gaps on the résumé are sort of more of the latter, imo
You know what I do when someone casually asks me a question I don’t want to answer? I keep it vague and give them a chance to pick up the hint. I don’t give them a stone cold “I’m not going to answer that.” like a defensive weirdo.
Feels like a lot of people in this thread don’t realize an interview is a conversation. Or they just don’t know how to have a conversation…
Seems like they think conversations involve certain spells and invocations to force it to go the way they want. Like if you have a legal right, you must aggressively invoke it so your opponent realizes you’re a legal mastermind and hands you the job to avoid lawsuits.
Feels kinda like that advice for interacting with cops that sounded more like “how to be legally right while escalating interactions with the police”. Or the sovereign citizen version that drops the “legally right” part entirely.
It ignores the reality that anyone can judge you for any reason and that it’s practically impossible to prove or even know why they reject you after an interview, so it doesn’t even matter if they did it for an illegal reason as long as they didn’t outright tell you (or each other in writing if you do try to sue, which btw if you sue someone over how a job interview goes, few will want to even interview you if they know about it, even if you’re completely in the right).
Also displaying dominance when you don’t have it just shows that you won’t be a pleasant person to interact with regularly. And the people trying to argue this point with you are proving the point more than anything else by treating the pushback of “you don’t need to state that so defensively” as “forget your worker rights and boundaries, you’re going to be a slave!”
While workers rights can be a trump card, you don’t pull them out in an interview as most trump cards aren’t in play yet.
I think a more productive and empathetic approach would be to probe such a person on practical job-relevant hypotheticals of a similar nature, in order to actually get an idea of how they would handle those situations - if that’s really what you’re worried about. Why be so quick to label people negatively based solely on personal boundaries? Do you think it’s better to skirt one’s way around an issue than to address it?
Because time is limited and they’re not the only candidate.
based solely on personal boundaries?
Literally nothing to do with them HAVING boundaries. Why are so many replies acting like I’m not talking about their attitude? Replace the question with anything the interviewer doesn’t have the right to know.
“I see you’ve mostly worked in [other state], what brought you out here? Certainly not the weather, haha”
“I am not required to disclose my whereabouts or reason for travel outside of my work hours”
Sounds like a person I’d want on my team for sure.
That sounds to me like someone who doesn’t want to be stepped all over in the name of having a career, and it also sounds like you’re impatiently skipping over people while also paradoxically expecting to understand everything about who they are from a singular and very limited interaction.
During a job interview, you evidently see people as an abstract mesh of characteristics that you believe you can deduce their entire identity from, and similarly they mostly see you as a mere abstract mechanism of the company. I’m sure that such a candidate would be happy to answer more personal questions over a stress-free cup of coffee, feeling like they’re chatting with a person instead of having to win over a corporate proxy.
I don’t think anyone goes to a job interview expecting to be applying for friendship with the interviewer, but to have their relevant skills evaluated first and foremost. It’s perfectly normal to find anything else extremely weird and needlessly intrusive and to reserve one’s right to privacy and go look for another, saner workplace.
It’s just about the same issue as with chat control. You also haven’t addressed my other points, so I assume that what you actually value in the workforce is half-truths and facades.
Yeah it’s much better to begin with a more polite “It was medical in nature and I’d prefer not to discuss it.” And only pull out the “hey, legally you can’t ask about my medical issues” if they continue.
Yeah, a much more normal way to say that is “I was dealing with a medical condition. It’s no longer an issue, but it’s a bit personal, so I’d prefer if we didn’t get into more than that.”
I mean, you asking to explain my medical history is lawsuit vibes.
“I didn’t know this gap was for medical reasons” Why the fuck are you asking about a gap in my work history in the first place? What I did 5 years ago is irrelevant to this interview today.
It’s so weird to draw weapons in response to that. Do you really always assume the absolute worst intent when someone asks open-ended questions? If so, it’s hard to feel bad for you. You are one of the worst kinds of coworkers to have.
“Hey tocopherol, do anything fun this weekend?”
“How I spend my weekends is none of your business and I’m offended that you even though asking was appropriate!”
It’s the same type of person ready to pick a fight over any perceived transgression. They pick stupid fights with their managers and make it a worse place to work for everyone.
What are you talking about? You’re the one assuming the worst and being weird by not respecting a simple request in an interview! You just told me you assume they are going to escalate minor inconveniences because they requested basic respect.
Throwing a boilerplate legal defense in response to a question that’s most likely being asked casually is a total tone shift. No one’s going to think, “wow, this person really knows their rights!”
It almost makes you sound guilty of something. Preemptively defensive when you haven’t been pressed in the slightest
I didn’t assume it had to be stated like a legal disclaimer, whatever kind of response a person makes it’s good to match the interviewers tone. I agree with you that you don’t want to come off confrontational, I didn’t read it that way.
What kind of jobs have you applied for where the interview was an interrogation requiring you to be defensive? Every interview I have EVER had has been friendly, from field construction to corporate offices.
Lots of people don’t struggle to find jobs. Maybe you could take 5min to reflect on why some people would call this “snapping back”, rather than post a snarky comment.
No2 will make any interviewer exclude you as they don’t want to hire a “lemon”
Lemon is right…but not because they have medical problems. I’m left as hell but I’d get so annoyed if an interview candidate snapped back like that. I’d think “this person is going to escalate any minor inconvenience”
It’s because they have boundaries.
No, it’s because of how they choose to respond to a tiny bit of friction.
They’re the type of person who wouldn’t take 2 minutes to help you with something that’s not explicitly outlined in their job description.
Yeah.
Boundaries.
A completely inflexible person.
Someone who isn’t willing to be taken advantage of.
Someone who thinks helping out with something is “being taken advantage of”
Someone with a persecution complex.
Professional victim.
The type of person called their mom hitler growing up because she told you to clean your room.
Someone who thinks that working off the clock is “helping out with something.”
Acting their wage.
Helping out your coworkers on a one-off thing is just a thing normal people do. People like you are insufferable
People who live to work are insufferable. People who set work/life boundaries are not.
It depends, I know people that would be glad to help on the work but will not tolerate out of work pondering. Gaps on the résumé are sort of more of the latter, imo
You know what I do when someone casually asks me a question I don’t want to answer? I keep it vague and give them a chance to pick up the hint. I don’t give them a stone cold “I’m not going to answer that.” like a defensive weirdo.
Feels like a lot of people in this thread don’t realize an interview is a conversation. Or they just don’t know how to have a conversation…
Seems like they think conversations involve certain spells and invocations to force it to go the way they want. Like if you have a legal right, you must aggressively invoke it so your opponent realizes you’re a legal mastermind and hands you the job to avoid lawsuits.
Feels kinda like that advice for interacting with cops that sounded more like “how to be legally right while escalating interactions with the police”. Or the sovereign citizen version that drops the “legally right” part entirely.
It ignores the reality that anyone can judge you for any reason and that it’s practically impossible to prove or even know why they reject you after an interview, so it doesn’t even matter if they did it for an illegal reason as long as they didn’t outright tell you (or each other in writing if you do try to sue, which btw if you sue someone over how a job interview goes, few will want to even interview you if they know about it, even if you’re completely in the right).
Those “know your rights” videos are exactly what came to mind. Not only is it unnecessarily combative, you’re showing your whole hand.
Knowing your rights is important. Telling someone you know your rights when they’re not pressing you to abandon them is something else.
Also displaying dominance when you don’t have it just shows that you won’t be a pleasant person to interact with regularly. And the people trying to argue this point with you are proving the point more than anything else by treating the pushback of “you don’t need to state that so defensively” as “forget your worker rights and boundaries, you’re going to be a slave!”
While workers rights can be a trump card, you don’t pull them out in an interview as most trump cards aren’t in play yet.
I think a more productive and empathetic approach would be to probe such a person on practical job-relevant hypotheticals of a similar nature, in order to actually get an idea of how they would handle those situations - if that’s really what you’re worried about. Why be so quick to label people negatively based solely on personal boundaries? Do you think it’s better to skirt one’s way around an issue than to address it?
Because time is limited and they’re not the only candidate.
Literally nothing to do with them HAVING boundaries. Why are so many replies acting like I’m not talking about their attitude? Replace the question with anything the interviewer doesn’t have the right to know.
“I see you’ve mostly worked in [other state], what brought you out here? Certainly not the weather, haha”
“I am not required to disclose my whereabouts or reason for travel outside of my work hours”
Sounds like a person I’d want on my team for sure.
That sounds to me like someone who doesn’t want to be stepped all over in the name of having a career, and it also sounds like you’re impatiently skipping over people while also paradoxically expecting to understand everything about who they are from a singular and very limited interaction.
During a job interview, you evidently see people as an abstract mesh of characteristics that you believe you can deduce their entire identity from, and similarly they mostly see you as a mere abstract mechanism of the company. I’m sure that such a candidate would be happy to answer more personal questions over a stress-free cup of coffee, feeling like they’re chatting with a person instead of having to win over a corporate proxy.
I don’t think anyone goes to a job interview expecting to be applying for friendship with the interviewer, but to have their relevant skills evaluated first and foremost. It’s perfectly normal to find anything else extremely weird and needlessly intrusive and to reserve one’s right to privacy and go look for another, saner workplace.
It’s just about the same issue as with chat control. You also haven’t addressed my other points, so I assume that what you actually value in the workforce is half-truths and facades.
Its a conversation that determines whether you can collect enough credits to have food and shelter. Defensiveness seems like a natural reaction, no?
I mean if you put it that way… No? Why would your natural reaction be to sabotage yourself?
Are you this honest when they ask what your greatest weakness is?
Yeah it’s much better to begin with a more polite “It was medical in nature and I’d prefer not to discuss it.” And only pull out the “hey, legally you can’t ask about my medical issues” if they continue.
Thank you. You’re one of the only people in my replies who gets what I’m saying lol
Other people are acting like the interviewer is demanding answers.
I would hate to be interviewed by you, asking for respect of medical privacy is “snapping back”? No wonder it sucks so fucking much to find a new job.
Legalese style “I will not be discussing this matter any further” in an interview does give off future lawsuit vibes.
Yeah, a much more normal way to say that is “I was dealing with a medical condition. It’s no longer an issue, but it’s a bit personal, so I’d prefer if we didn’t get into more than that.”
I wouldn’t even say that much. Any interviewer asking about a ‘gap in my resume’ is already coming off to me as a micromanaging cunt.
I mean, you asking to explain my medical history is lawsuit vibes.
“I didn’t know this gap was for medical reasons” Why the fuck are you asking about a gap in my work history in the first place? What I did 5 years ago is irrelevant to this interview today.
It’s so weird to draw weapons in response to that. Do you really always assume the absolute worst intent when someone asks open-ended questions? If so, it’s hard to feel bad for you. You are one of the worst kinds of coworkers to have.
“Hey tocopherol, do anything fun this weekend?”
“How I spend my weekends is none of your business and I’m offended that you even though asking was appropriate!”
“Ok dude have fun sitting in your car at lunch”
A professional interview in which personal questions are being asked inappropriately is not even close to friendly banter between co-workers.
It’s the same type of person ready to pick a fight over any perceived transgression. They pick stupid fights with their managers and make it a worse place to work for everyone.
What are you talking about? You’re the one assuming the worst and being weird by not respecting a simple request in an interview! You just told me you assume they are going to escalate minor inconveniences because they requested basic respect.
Throwing a boilerplate legal defense in response to a question that’s most likely being asked casually is a total tone shift. No one’s going to think, “wow, this person really knows their rights!”
It almost makes you sound guilty of something. Preemptively defensive when you haven’t been pressed in the slightest
I didn’t assume it had to be stated like a legal disclaimer, whatever kind of response a person makes it’s good to match the interviewers tone. I agree with you that you don’t want to come off confrontational, I didn’t read it that way.
But you’re replying in a comment chain that’s talking about phrasing it the way that was quoted.
Yeah, casually asking something on a job interview
What kind of jobs have you applied for where the interview was an interrogation requiring you to be defensive? Every interview I have EVER had has been friendly, from field construction to corporate offices.
Corporate office in a factory, they were very old school in what to expect from a candidate
But a couple of times I met other interviewers that made me feel like that, albeit to a less extent
Lots of people don’t struggle to find jobs. Maybe you could take 5min to reflect on why some people would call this “snapping back”, rather than post a snarky comment.
An interview works both ways. If that’s how they consider humans, then you dodged a bullet.