People saying this mean to say that family bonds are more important than friendships.
But it’s incomplete. The full expression:
blood runs thicker than water from the womb
Meaning blood bonds, friendships, are stronger than family connections, the water from the womb.
I have a brother who votes for a conspiracy right wing party. My mother keeps spreading racist slurs and follows right wing populists and media. My father is more like me, but is afraid to get into conflict so he always takes my mother’s side.
I told them, after countless chances, I’m done with them. I broke off all contact, with a long explanation without convictions, attacks, blaming or what so ever. Just explaining I feel hurt by how I feel treated and I feel helpless as any form of conversation ends in full scale attacks onto me, blaming me for everything, calling me a child in its puberty (I’m 39) who never takes responsibility (while I always take full responsibility for my actions, while they have never done so).
I’m happy with my group of honest and deep friendships. I don’t need my family. They wrote me out of their will. I don’t care. I don’t need anything from them anymore. I’m surrounded by amazing and loving people, while they are going to die sad and alone.
People saying this mean to say that family bonds are more important than friendships.
That is how this phrase has been interpreted since the 12th century.
But it’s incomplete. The full expression:
blood runs thicker than water from the womb
This version comes from “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb”. A couple of writers in the late 20th - early 21st century made the claim that this was the original phrasing; however, they did not cite any sources to back up this claim. See details in the Wikipedia entry.
Ok sure, but it doesn’t change my point. I can also understand that in certain cultures and in history your family is all you have. But in these days they are just people you cannot chose, just like colleagues. Friends however, are people you meet and connect with because you are similar. These bonds are much stronger than someone that shares some DNA with you. Doesn’t mean you can’t have strong bonds with family too, but it’s not a given they are always the strongest connections you have. In my case, and in the case of some of my friends, family members are just a disappointment while my friends and I have unconditional love for eachother and are even there through the hardest times. While my parents just concern themselves for me just not dressing the way they like and not having the career and education they wanted me to have, therefore judging me and pushing me away. Especially in times I need support instead of judgement and resentment.
Sure, I’ve heard that referred to as your “logical family” (as opposed to your “biological family” ). I have estranged family members, too.
What’s interesting is HC Trumbull’s contrast with the Arabic concept of blood being thicker than milk (from the Wikipedia entry) which seems to be closer to your meaning. I’m not sure if this is referring to people who have fought together or if it’s some kind of “blood brother” ritual, though. Unfortunately, in English the word “blood” is used as a metaphor for family.
In my case, and in the case of some of my friends, family members are just a disappointment while my friends and I have unconditional love for eachother and are even there through the hardest times.
I’m glad that you’ve found friends like this. I don’t understand the appeal of unconditional love, though. I expect that if I turned into a horrible person, my friends’ love for me would go away, and I wouldn’t think any less of them for that.
It seems like your love for your family is conditional upon them not being assholes. I think that’s completely reasonable and appropriate, but why have unconditional love for your friends but not your family? If your friends started treating you the same way your estranged family members have, wouldn’t your love for your friends also cease?
Maybe I’m missing something important about love here. This seems likely, because a lot of people hold the value of unconditional love in high regard and act as though its goodness is so obvious that it doesn’t need to be explained. Perhaps you could tell me how I’m wrong here.
Too much absolutes. Not enough data for complete analysis.
Won’t discuss expression. There are many different expressions, with most of them being controversial. Even from the same authors.
Many variables in your life case fit only your exact situation. Your family members are also human beings. Their views are subject of change. From your own words your father isn’t that bad. If others deserved a complete ending of any relations, does he? Just because he’s part of that currently toxic relationships family?
Now people have a really different life experiences. It’s good if you’re very selective on people and your friends are truly that reliable. Some people have good families and their family members are also good or best friends to them at the same time. The only thing that really matters here is core difference between how relationships function: love of mother/father is completely different from love of wife/husband. Many people are missing this fact.
Not much people in our lives are really capable physically, mentally and financially of holding us up in different situations, force majors.
Friends are also people. They can become corrupted, change into being bad. They can become too busy with their own life problems to have a time to really care about your problems. Family you create is also a different thing. Usually not equals to family you came from at all. You can create it to be also responsible for you, but it’s never intended to be like this. Children detach and start their own families. One of the most shitty fact about families: family members also die.
Met one grown ass dude a while ago. He had everything: his own family, good friends, nice job, and generally all percs of such life…
Wife and daughter died from cancer. Rest of his children are somewhere else living their own lives. Besties? Too busy.
Who took care of him? Government? Lmfao, governments are mostly disabled. Rehabs only made him even more drug addict. And who? Who took care of such a useless, absolutely wasted member of society. His only fate according to modern social morals is to die on cold street as some junkie crap no one needs and everyone forgot.
Oh, his mother took care of him nevertheless.
Family may be a fallback in emergency life situations.
However, there are plenty of other cases, when family more ruins people’s lives, than sustains.
Some grown ass dude i also met some time ago have a mother who hated his wife for whatever reason and wished to his son to die. Some parents fucking kill their children. Some children fucking kill their parents.
How i see this situation: it’s complicated, but feels too odd, rather artificial. Totally stimulated by intelligence by various daily psyops. They are interested in dissolution and division in the first place. Surely, in such a wonderful condition, family as phenomenon undergoes many negative changes, degradation.
You’ve confirmed political views are playing a major role in process of your alienation from your family.
Not trying to get ahead of us all, and let’s, of course, see how it goes.
But i have a bad feeling, that if it’ll continue down this path, we all gonna die sad and lonely, completely isolated in personal grey wall boxes.
Well, fuck. Bad words.
Wishing y’all a great day tho. Here’s a pic to laugh at.
There is this saying that is misinterpreted.
People saying this mean to say that family bonds are more important than friendships.
But it’s incomplete. The full expression:
Meaning blood bonds, friendships, are stronger than family connections, the water from the womb.
I have a brother who votes for a conspiracy right wing party. My mother keeps spreading racist slurs and follows right wing populists and media. My father is more like me, but is afraid to get into conflict so he always takes my mother’s side.
I told them, after countless chances, I’m done with them. I broke off all contact, with a long explanation without convictions, attacks, blaming or what so ever. Just explaining I feel hurt by how I feel treated and I feel helpless as any form of conversation ends in full scale attacks onto me, blaming me for everything, calling me a child in its puberty (I’m 39) who never takes responsibility (while I always take full responsibility for my actions, while they have never done so).
I’m happy with my group of honest and deep friendships. I don’t need my family. They wrote me out of their will. I don’t care. I don’t need anything from them anymore. I’m surrounded by amazing and loving people, while they are going to die sad and alone.
Why would you just repeat some bullshit you heard somewhere without looking it up?
Entirely fictitious
That is how this phrase has been interpreted since the 12th century.
This version comes from “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb”. A couple of writers in the late 20th - early 21st century made the claim that this was the original phrasing; however, they did not cite any sources to back up this claim. See details in the Wikipedia entry.
Ok sure, but it doesn’t change my point. I can also understand that in certain cultures and in history your family is all you have. But in these days they are just people you cannot chose, just like colleagues. Friends however, are people you meet and connect with because you are similar. These bonds are much stronger than someone that shares some DNA with you. Doesn’t mean you can’t have strong bonds with family too, but it’s not a given they are always the strongest connections you have. In my case, and in the case of some of my friends, family members are just a disappointment while my friends and I have unconditional love for eachother and are even there through the hardest times. While my parents just concern themselves for me just not dressing the way they like and not having the career and education they wanted me to have, therefore judging me and pushing me away. Especially in times I need support instead of judgement and resentment.
Sure, I’ve heard that referred to as your “logical family” (as opposed to your “biological family” ). I have estranged family members, too.
What’s interesting is HC Trumbull’s contrast with the Arabic concept of blood being thicker than milk (from the Wikipedia entry) which seems to be closer to your meaning. I’m not sure if this is referring to people who have fought together or if it’s some kind of “blood brother” ritual, though. Unfortunately, in English the word “blood” is used as a metaphor for family.
I’m glad that you’ve found friends like this. I don’t understand the appeal of unconditional love, though. I expect that if I turned into a horrible person, my friends’ love for me would go away, and I wouldn’t think any less of them for that.
It seems like your love for your family is conditional upon them not being assholes. I think that’s completely reasonable and appropriate, but why have unconditional love for your friends but not your family? If your friends started treating you the same way your estranged family members have, wouldn’t your love for your friends also cease?
Maybe I’m missing something important about love here. This seems likely, because a lot of people hold the value of unconditional love in high regard and act as though its goodness is so obvious that it doesn’t need to be explained. Perhaps you could tell me how I’m wrong here.
The version of the expression I’ve heard is
And it’s also total BS. This was never the expression until someone tacked it on recently.
Too much absolutes. Not enough data for complete analysis. Won’t discuss expression. There are many different expressions, with most of them being controversial. Even from the same authors. Many variables in your life case fit only your exact situation. Your family members are also human beings. Their views are subject of change. From your own words your father isn’t that bad. If others deserved a complete ending of any relations, does he? Just because he’s part of that currently toxic relationships family?
Now people have a really different life experiences. It’s good if you’re very selective on people and your friends are truly that reliable. Some people have good families and their family members are also good or best friends to them at the same time. The only thing that really matters here is core difference between how relationships function: love of mother/father is completely different from love of wife/husband. Many people are missing this fact. Not much people in our lives are really capable physically, mentally and financially of holding us up in different situations, force majors.
Friends are also people. They can become corrupted, change into being bad. They can become too busy with their own life problems to have a time to really care about your problems. Family you create is also a different thing. Usually not equals to family you came from at all. You can create it to be also responsible for you, but it’s never intended to be like this. Children detach and start their own families. One of the most shitty fact about families: family members also die. Met one grown ass dude a while ago. He had everything: his own family, good friends, nice job, and generally all percs of such life… Wife and daughter died from cancer. Rest of his children are somewhere else living their own lives. Besties? Too busy. Who took care of him? Government? Lmfao, governments are mostly disabled. Rehabs only made him even more drug addict. And who? Who took care of such a useless, absolutely wasted member of society. His only fate according to modern social morals is to die on cold street as some junkie crap no one needs and everyone forgot. Oh, his mother took care of him nevertheless. Family may be a fallback in emergency life situations.
However, there are plenty of other cases, when family more ruins people’s lives, than sustains. Some grown ass dude i also met some time ago have a mother who hated his wife for whatever reason and wished to his son to die. Some parents fucking kill their children. Some children fucking kill their parents.
How i see this situation: it’s complicated, but feels too odd, rather artificial. Totally stimulated by intelligence by various daily psyops. They are interested in dissolution and division in the first place. Surely, in such a wonderful condition, family as phenomenon undergoes many negative changes, degradation. You’ve confirmed political views are playing a major role in process of your alienation from your family.
Not trying to get ahead of us all, and let’s, of course, see how it goes. But i have a bad feeling, that if it’ll continue down this path, we all gonna die sad and lonely, completely isolated in personal grey wall boxes.
Well, fuck. Bad words. Wishing y’all a great day tho. Here’s a pic to laugh at.