• rabber@lemmy.caOP
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    11 hours ago

    It’s not just the sex that’s the best though. Nobody’s ever been this nice to me before just in general. I really don’t want to run :(

    I’ll check that book thx

    • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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      10 hours ago

      this is classic abuse victim rationalization.

      Just because she treats you less like shit than other people in the past have, doesn’t mean she still isn’t treating you like shit.

      • rabber@lemmy.caOP
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        9 hours ago

        I’m mentally ill too to be clear so it kind of goes both ways here lol. I’m a self destructive type of person so I feel like I almost deserve and even enjoy being treated like shit in some sort of way

        I’m raised by narcissists and I’m slowly deprogramming from that and I hate to admit this but I think part of the reason I like her is she is extremely easy to manipulate and it’s easy for me to get her to do whatever I want. I don’t really intend to manipulate people but it’s still something I do sometimes that I really wish I didn’t. People with BPD are easily manipulated usually

          • rabber@lemmy.caOP
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            9 hours ago

            So far it feels like a net win compared to the rest of my shit life and I was single for 1.5 years before this and I couldn’t really stand it anymore

            No normal girl is going to tolerate me in a long term relationship, they are completely out of my league

    • ivanafterall ☑️@lemmy.world
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      10 hours ago

      Same here. She really, really loved me, in her way, and I love(d) her. Closest I’ve had yet to something long-term sustainable. But was it tho? She compared me to Jesus and called me a sex god. She drew my penis as art. Touched me constantly. Said I looked and smelled like a French king (it was well-intentioned). Really took an interest in my hobbies–to the point that they became her hobbies and it became a lot. We were really, really close. I ended up having to call the police on her when she finally confessed to the cheating and it ended. She shaved her head and moved to Indonesia. As with the highs, so with the lows.

      • rabber@lemmy.caOP
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        9 hours ago

        Dude that is crazy. Are you doing ok now? That would traumatize me for the rest of my life.

        What you said is terrifying accurate to my situation, she treats me like some literal god

        I don’t think she’s the type to cheat but you have me questioning that now. I am a lot more concerned she will kill herself rather than cheat tbh but if either of those things happened I’d be a destroyed person