• EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      6 hours ago

      It was a dark and stormy night when our ship crashed. The rain drops glistened in the fires like a lit cigarette. Only a handful of us survived, but we made camp the best we could. Sherry handled the tents, old Joe the wood. Six others scavenged supplies. Me? I just sat there, wondering what ol’ Lady Luck will do to me next.

      Soon after that, the killings started. One by one, our companions disappeared, like my ex-wives after a night of hard drinking. Aliens did it, I’d wager. Too grisly for a man, even less so for a dame.

      I barely escaped that moon; but ever since then I’ve wondered what it was all for, the guilt weighing on my soul like an empty pocket with a bar tab.

      • YourNetworkIsHaunted@awful.systems
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        48 minutes ago

        You’re a damn fool, Dick! That’s not guilt weighing on your conscience, it’s an alien embryo eating its way through your heart!

        just like my ex-wives. I was surprised there was anything left to eat. But I was realizing I still had enough to hurt

        Stop monologuing, Dick! We have to get you to a doctor before it bursts through your manly trenchcoated chest!

        I wondered if I would be a better father than mine had been. Given I’d be dead I figured I had a head-start on the old bastard

        Oh, Dick…

        [Grayscale Splurtching Noises]