• Alberat@lemmy.world
      2·
      3 hours ago

      Lembas bread, one bite is enough to fill the stomach of a grown man while allowing him to go through multiple security checkpoints without pooping.

  • Fmstrat@lemmy.world
    2·
    10 hours ago

    Are there any instances out there that archive deletes? If it was deleted after I shut mine down, I might have the comments.

  • xerxos@feddit.orgDeutsch
    116·
    23 hours ago

    Oh, I think this is a post of a home-shitter ( someone who only shits at home, not at someone else’s home, not in public toilets and definitively not in nature ) who tries to go on a multi-day travel. Rather a than getting over his mental block, he tries to prep his body to not shit for 3 days.

    Poor soul.

    • Apytele@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
      35·
      16 hours ago

      have had IBS my whole life. hearing people say this is like hearing people say they only breathe at home. they just. hold their breath. until they get back. Shit WILL exit my body when I’m away from home and I generally prefer it to be in a toilet.

      • mediOchre@sh.itjust.works
        16·
        17 hours ago

        i’m at the complete opposite end of the brown spectrum. i poop on average once a week, at most twice a week, thrice if i ate something bad. i have a fecalysis scheduled for today and so far it’s been 3 hours of me unsuccesfully forcing my bowels to move lol

        • yabbadabaddon@lemmy.zip
          10·
          14 hours ago

          A very cold apple juice + a very strong espresso will turn you into a propelled vehicle in about 30minutes. Hope you read this early enough.

        • bluegreenpurplepink@lemmy.world
          2·
          13 hours ago

          Have you tried magnesium? You can get it in a lot of different foods. Just look up what foods have it. You can also take magnesium supplements. I used to be like you, and once I started taking magnesium it got me to go regularly like everybody else.

          • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
            1·
            3 hours ago

            Make sure it’s the “citrate” variety. That’s the one that mostly helps move things along. There are other types also available as supplements that have different effects that probably won’t benefit someone looking for digestive help.

        • Life_inst_bad@lemmy.world
          3·
          15 hours ago

          A Poop one a week is totaly fine but if you’re unsuccessfully trying for a bowel movement/poop for 3 hours something’s not right. A more fiber richt diet might help. Also drinking enough water helps. Mabe get something like a squatty-potty or channel your inner rat king.

    • FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world
      49·
      22 hours ago

      I used to be a home shitter, i used to even be a home pisser at school age, but then i started drinking a healthy amount of water.

      I am so so glad i’ve gotten over the mental block.

      • FishFace@piefed.socialEnglish
        11·
        12 hours ago

        At the school I went to if you shat at school someone would bang on the cubicle door and laugh at you. Caused some definite problems for me

      • einfach_orangensaft@sh.itjust.works
        14·
        22 hours ago

        uh then thats the wrong plan for sure, for that its more about eating the right things at the right times, if done right that can make like 8h of each day usable without going hungry

        • NannerBanner@literature.cafe
          10·
          19 hours ago

          Whoah, share that wisdom with the rest of us. I’d just like more regularity in my life. (and don’t tell me to eat more fiber. I eat enough fiber. Beans are cheap, and cheap is important right now.)

          • einfach_orangensaft@sh.itjust.works
            2·
            14 hours ago

            I feel thats very subjective to every person due to different digestion speeds, but its all about knowing how your body will react do different food, drinks (mostly coffee) and physical activity. Eating portions that will basically go out in one go, while the next one is far enough up and sold enough to give you time. Normal pasta with cheese gets me good results. Like if you had your last meal around 18:00 last day, get a full night of sleep, have some coffee, do a little sport, get it all out at lets say at 10:00, then have the next meal of pasta…you got yourself a 8h time slot for fun.

  • tixnou@feddit.cl
    43·
    21 hours ago

    Is it really a shitpost if it’s about not shitting? Wouldn’t it just be a post?

    • Sunflier@lemmy.worldEnglish
      4·
      16 hours ago

      Its a shitty shit-post. No. That wouldn’t work, because its not a post on the quality of the shit post. A shit-shit post? A shit2 post?

    • kif@lemmy.nz
      7·
      13 hours ago

      Not certain, but I’m guessing it’s something to do with how archive.org archives. I’d say it probably captured some JavaScript which uses window.location.host, which would resolve to the original (say lemmy.nz) on the original page but web.archive.org on the snapshot.

      • pet the cat, walk the dog@lemmy.world
        2·
        4 hours ago

        Update: you seem to be at least partially correct about JS being involved: the webpage source as downloaded from archive.org has a shitton of data in JS structures, while the actual final HTML of that element is nowhere to be found. Meaning the DOM is assembled from the JS data on the fly. Now, the page url, as I predicted, doesn’t seem to figure in this, because the data itself contains numerous instances of ‘web.archive.org’ in it. I’m guessing that Archive’s algorithm replaced the site domain to be prefixed with Archive’s domain and went a bit overboard about it, which seems then to have confused Lemmy’s JS into using the web.archive.org domain as the instance domain when rendering the page.

        For better or worse, I don’t use stimulants harder than tea, and amn’t so young anymore as to reverse-engineer this thing further.

      • pet the cat, walk the dog@lemmy.world
        1·
        9 hours ago

        That’s very doubtful, seeing as since the post might belong to any of the multitude of instances, the api must send the instance name in the response to the client. The client’s host doesn’t figure in that. Additionally, the screenshot looks like the default UI, whatever it’s called (at least default for lemmy.world), and it doesn’t show the instance domain for communities on the same instance (at least doesn’t show currently).

        But I’ll look into the JS hypothesis later. Weird shit is afoot there.

    • EpeeGnome@feddit.onlineEnglish
      9·
      16 hours ago

      I was there, Bootleg. I was there 3 thousand years ago. I was there the day the patience of Lemmy failed. I mean, come on mizu6079, just tell us why you need to avoid pooping for that long!

      But yeah, that happened right after I started using Lemmy. I’d been commenting for less than a week, and my first post was a “Chewy, we’re home” meme about how all the memes on the topic made me feel as a new user. That account’s long dead now, but apparently lemmy.world still has my post https://lemmy.world/post/560966. Federation is neat.

    • Mîm@lemmy.zip
      22·
      24 hours ago

      So was I.
      Although my account back then was on a now dead instance. 😔

        • Mîm@lemmy.zip
          41·
          23 hours ago

          I was on feddit.de (RIF).

          Are the bins even with us anymore? Don’t think i have seen them in a while.

              • macniel@feddit.org
                1·
                3 hours ago

                There was once a lone server admin who ran the show and but everything was good.

                Then people came, we don’t tell from where, and the users and amount of posts increases, the lone server admin no longer could handle all of that themself and asked some mods to co-admin the instance. Everything was good again

                Then the server admin took a well deserved vacation, to an unknown location. But the co admins could handle the administrative stuff. Everything seemed good.

                Then bugs were detected. Updates were needed. Harddisks ran full. The dreaded /pictrs issue arose and caused PTSD. Required keys and permissions were not granted to the co admins. But hope remain that the server admin returns from their vacation…

                they never returned…

                the migration to a new instance was costly,
                the fate of that server admin? shrouded in mysteries.

                disclaimer I suck at story telling in a non native language.

      • EpeeGnome@feddit.onlineEnglish
        15·
        16 hours ago

        OP commented cheerfully on all the memes about him, but still refused to elaborate. Then he disappeared for the week, as expected. I can’t remember for sure, but I thought I recalled him returning briefly asking for advice on dealing with severe constipation, getting annoyed that everyone still only wanted to talk about how his week went and what the hell this was all about, and then he disappeared for good. I assume he’s likely still around under a new identity and he just sighs and clicks away every time this is brought up again.

          • EpeeGnome@feddit.onlineEnglish
            1·
            8 hours ago

            Maybe? Can’t go back and look because the account was deleted. I could have easily missed or even forgotten any additional details. Heck, I recently had to be reminded it was 3 days and not a whole week, so don’t put to much trust in my memory.

      • idegenszavak@sh.itjust.works
        30·
        22 hours ago

        IIRC OP disappeared, without an update. The most sane guess I read was that they were going to the Hajj, the Muslim pilgrimage to Mecca, they live in tents during that

    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
      6·
      22 hours ago

      i remember. I think that was one of my first days. I had helpfully unhelpful advice, like DONT DO IT MAN or EAT CORN if i know me

        • NannerBanner@literature.cafe
          11·
          19 hours ago

          (most) Fursuits are way too expensive to muck up with biological matters. I think the fursuiters I know would smile, close their eyes, and gently pat you for your joke, only to grow aghast as they realize the reality of the suggestion of something that could fuck with their gigantic investment.

      • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
        10·
        21 hours ago

        yeah but then there won’t be appropriate structural support for a dragon with a fat ass to have a tail you can swing around like a feather boa for 27 years they been doing it now. [edit: swear to your god 27 years that fursuit survived]

        i had to climb out through the neck because i was a dipshit and made it that way

        i’m starting to realize why the other high school kids assumed things i just like making art okay