Despite my one moment of sheer misandry, which I apologize for…I love you guys ❤️
I probably can’t offer much in the way of comfort…
NSFW, TMI
…I mean, all I can offer is my body, and I doubt you’d want that :P…
…but I really, truly, honestly appreciate all of you guys. Really 💜
Without men, my life would be pretty boring and honestly pointless. And I don’t just mean for sexual reasons…
NSFW, TMI
…well, the sexual reasons are a big and important part of it too, ngl, but they’re not the only reason.
I see and appreciate you. You matter 🩷
To me. To your families. To everyone here ❤️
This isn’t much comfort, but if any of you guys needs someone to talk to, my Matrix account is:
@horny_miisha:chat.blahaj.zone
Feel free to reach out!
You’re not alone. You’re never alone. I love you guys 💜
If I’m honest for a sec, I’ve been struggling lately.
Work has been super intense and nothing I can do ever feels like it’s enough.
Deep down, I know it’s not a me problem, hell, I’m the best damn person for this particular task, it’s just… a lot. That also means I’ll have to lead this thing for a month, away from home this time.
People see how I fix things and think it’s easy for me.
It’s not. I’m just used to making shit work at the cost of my own self.
I’m tired of paying that toll and I don’t know how much longer I can keep it together.I recognize this present overwork-dragon facing me, I’ve been down this road before and I know how wholly it can consume me. Not even in a vore way either.
Being away also means there’s nobody to fuck my brains out or use me as a toy to take my mind off this thing.Still, silver linings… this time I’m lucky enough to have my soul-friend-bestie along.
It doesn’t make it less bullshit, but at least we’re going insane together.
Anyway, idk why I’m dumping a wall of text here.
Gotta get back to it… peace.Don’t feel bad about sharing your feelings. Never do!
I’m sorry you’re struggling like that. I know how rough things can be, but not like this. I’m sorry…
I’m glad you’re still here with us. And I’m glad you have such a good friend in your life 🫂
I can’t really offer much, but if you’d like to talk about any of this stuff, I’m here.
Please don’t give up! You’re not alone in this 🩷Work isn’t more important than your well being, you deserve to be seen. I’m so happy to see that you’ve got a supportive partner. You matter. You matter independent of the work you do for others.
It gets better <3
deleted by creator
I lost my dad to sucicide when I was younger, it’s a deamon that trickles down and has knocked at the door at multiple points in my life. But I think knowing what happens after is what has helped me embrace life as much as I have. The sun will always rise tommorrow
I’m so sorry, that’s horrible! I’m glad you haven’t given up. The world is better with you in it 🫂️
I lost a good friend to suicide a few years ago. Around the same time, I was sexually assaulted by a friend I had confided in about my grief. He got away with it because I was too afraid to speak up, and to this day nobody knows it happened. The only reason I’m still around is because I know firsthand what it’s like when someone you love kills themselves.
Thankfully, I’m doing much better these days, but I’ll never forget both what being suicidal feels like, and the exact reasons why I’ll never do it.
That’s so messed up…I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I can’t even imagine…
I’m glad you’re still here 🫂
If you’d like to talk about any of those things, I’m free. I’m here.
Please don’t give up! The world is better with you in it. Stay strong 💜
Thank you for posting this. It’s been a rough year and this helped. A lot of people just kind of expect a guy to drop dead of they have any problems, Feels like.
Yeah. That’s how I feel a lot of people feel and it fucking sucks. I’m sorry for you guys…I wish we could fix our broken society, but that’s wishful thinking…
Stay strong! 💜
NSFW, TMI
…I mean, all I can offer is my body, and I doubt you’d want that :P…
Girlie, you have a great man and growing following on the naughty side of the Fediverse. You sure about that? 😏
Also, having a person to talk to can be very important, and it’s cool of you to share this 😊
LOL
I’m super proud of myself 😂Yes, having someone to talk to is like one of the most important things in life, I feel. And I’m glad you’re all here ❤️
Thanks, we love you too!!!
Thank you. I love you all 💜️
The patriarchy is the enemy of men and women alike.
It’s even the little things. I am only now learning how to properly take care of my skin because… it’s just not something men are generally taught is important/how to do (in British culture, at least)
Fuck I didn’t expect to tear up browsing Lemmy for memes but here we are
This may sound weird, but I’m glad ❤️
Pre-HRT, I just couldn’t cry. It was impossible. And crying is really important. So I’m really glad for that 🩷I have always had the opposite problem. Severe depression will do that to you and it can be embarrassing
Wow…
Well, I think it shouldn’t be embarrassing. Crying is good and natural and it feels good! And nobody should be embarrassed for that!
I’m…glad you can cry? If that’s not too weird to say?
I’m sorry for your depression. It’s really a bitch 🫂️
I’m just going to share this here, and it’s entirely anecdotal.
I’ll put it behind a drop down so read it of your own volition.
spoiler
Somehow despite being quite the introvert I have somehow managed to encounter numerous men who have been horrifically abused by the women in their life, myself included. For example one young lad who regularly slept with his own mother, a grandmother who did wildly inappropriate things with her grandkids (hiding candy in her clothing…)
I lived with emotional abuse from my mother, and a creepy cougar teacher who was far to interested in a younger me.
Later in life, I had a small group of friends and out of the 4 of them, all 4 had been out right sexually assaulted.
One guy was roofied at a club by a wannabe dominatrix who didn’t understand BDSM, woke up in her bed chained up.
Another woke up to an older female cousin raping him while he was sleeping on a couch.
Then there was the guy who worked in bars, hen parties were a nightmare and plenty of women would get handsy and see nothing wrong with it.
There’s more but I don’t remember right now, and I don’t want to dig it out.
So in summary… why am I mentioning this here?
It’s not to bash anyone, but rather to suggest that just like many guys are told to watch their brothers for abusive behaviour we should encourage women to be aware of the kind of abuse that other women can dish out and intervene if possible.
Also, if you do try to engage with a guy about his emotional state, do consider that it is extremely common for men to have in the past opened up to a partner only to have it weaponised against him thus making him hyper vigilant about doing so again.
The catholic Church in France alone has sexually abused at least 200000 children between 1950 and 2020. that is 1% of the population. In the context of catholic abuse it’s mostly males so it is safe to assume that around 2% of the male french population was sexually abused as a child by the catholic Church.
The notion that sexual abuse is only a women’s problem is pretty much a myth.
My father was raped by a male acquaintance as a young man. He was a state champion wrestler and it really messed with his head. He never told me this, which is normal, but I did find out about it. Most rapes are done by other men and it is way more common than men admit to.
Oh dear god…
I’m so sorry you went through that. Honestly that’s terrible and it’s something nobody deserves to go through. I’m so sorry 🫂I hope you’re doing at least a bit better. I have my own (serious) issues and I’m trying to get a therapist in the hopes of treating those…
Again, I’m so sorry you went through that. That’s honestly brutal. Even if this is naive…I sincerely hope we can both get over our traumas. Sorry I can’t offer much support 💙
Heya!
Well yeah… at the end of the day we’re all human :)
I’m doing somewhat better, my life is… weird. But compared to the difficulties some people live with, I’m content enough.
But I also do recognise that in many ways, I’m pretty broken. But, we keep going, try and find joy where we can :)
There’s a lot more I could say, I have some views that would probably be considered… weird as I was raised by a 2nd generation English feminist. But I also kind of don’t want to side track the thread :)
Please, don’t feel bad side tracking! This was meant to be a kind of vent thread for all the men over here. Don’t feel bad, it’s why I made the post ❤️
I definitely won’t judge you. And (I’d hope) nobody else will either.
Maybe its just because they arent allowed to Nut in November
I fucking hate that. I mean, it was no shave November to raise testicular/prostate dancer awareness, but nooooooo! Instead, some jackass decided it would be a better idea to rake away orgasms.
If you get good things all the time, they lose value.
Patriarchy hurts men too.
Famously, the first major legal win for feminism was a man getting custody of his child.
Its sad that so many men have swallowed the propaganda that feminism is somehow hurting them.
Feminism is good, but I do not think it’s right to fight for men’s rights under this banner. It’s simply too easy to hijack by reminding that feminism is, in principle, about women’s rights (hence the name), and completely lose the part about men from the conversation. This happened before, and it will happen again.
It’s very unfortunate that “men’s rights activism” was also hijacked by patriarchal assholes who have nothing in common with actual men’s rights. But masculism as a whole can be remedied, and can complement feminism organically as part of a broader antisexism movement.
So, ideally, we should agree on feminism being a movement for equality with focus on women’s issues, masculism is the same but focusing on specific issues of men, and both uniting to bash patriarchals and fight for a better, more equal and just future.
Patriarchy absolutely hurts men as well and I don’t want to take away from your comment. I fully support it. And I fully support men revolting against the patriarchy and living how they want to live without the pressure to conform.
The first major legal win for feminism was about a mother being granted custody because before 1839, fathers were automatically granted custody of their children.
The Custody of Infants Act of 1839 is often seen as the first feminist legislative victory in a long campaign to reform English marriage laws (Shanley 17, Chase and Levenson 40). While legal scholars have noted instances when a father’s total control over his legitimate children had been limited by judicial rulings prior to 1839 (Abramowicz 1345), the 1839 Act stands as the first major reform to recognize the rights of mothers. The important role played by Caroline Norton in the passage of the Act is also key to recognizing the law as a feminist triumph (Shanley 17).
Prior to the 1839 Custody of Infants Act, a father had a right to his legitimate children and was automatically granted custody if he and his wife separated for any reason (Bailey 393). Most fathers granted custody or access to the children’s mothers because it was considered ungentlemanly to deny mothers the opportunity to be with their children. Judges could also require a father to grant access or custody to the mother in circumstances in which the children’s welfare would be in jeopardy if they were left with their father. (Bailey 394)
My mistake, I was thinking of RBG in Weinberger v. Wiesenfeld
That is a perfect example of the patriarchy hurting men. Assuming men are the sole and primary earners in the family can lead to discriminatory decisions like this:
Stephen Wiesenfeld and Paula Polatschek were married in 1970. Polatschek had worked as a teacher for the five years prior to their marriage and continued teaching after they were married. Her salary was the principle source of the couple’s income, and social security contributions were regularly deducted from her salary. In 1972, Polatschek died in childbirth, which left Wiesenfeld with the care of their newborn son. Wiesenfeld applied for social security benefits for himself and his son, and was told that his son could receive them but that he could not. Social Security Act provides benefits based on the earnings of a deceased husband and father that are available to both the children and the widow. The benefits for a deceased wife and mother, however, are only available to the children.
In 1973, Wiesenfeld sued on behalf of himself and similarly situated widowers. He claimed that the relevant section of the Social Security Act unfairly discriminated on the basis of sex and sought summary judgment. A three-judge panel of the district court granted Wiesenfeld’s motion for summary judgment
Thanks for bringing it up!!
Just like how the men’s rights movement has absolutely dogshit people, the feminist movements also have some who see the movement in a selfish supremacist manner.
This is why I call myself a humanist or egalitarian, I want it to be clear I see neither sex nor gender as superior, and everyone is deserving of dignity, rights, and respect.
Hard to be depressed when we are absolutely dominating the leaderboard for these stats. Oorah fellas! 💪
(But don’t actually)
I’m sorry…🫂
This reminds me of the Brazil #1 homocide rate memes lol
Stay strong, boys. I… appreciate ya :p
I was just thinking about that lol
We’re so much more likely to die despite only leading in attempts by a small margin, because we’re just better at it
I’m a boy, I’m a boy
But my ma won’t admit it
I’m a boy, I’m a boy
But if I say I am I get itThis is also partially due to men choosing more violent methods that are harder to revoke. To slightly oversimplify, women tend to OD, men tend to chose guns, and if you OD with pills you usually have a few minutes at least to call for help that you don’t get with a gun.
So, just remember that part of gun safety and responsible ownership is a) storing the gun unloaded, b) having a trusted friend that you can give the gun to in the event of a mental health crisis, c) knowing your own signs and symptoms that indicate that plan needs to be activated.
I…I’ve considered getting a gun. Many times. Just pull the trigger and lights out. Sounds like goals, honestly…
God it would be so much easier than this…As someone who works in a trauma ward… You’d be surprised how often people mess up killing themselves with a firearm.
Ends up angles are hard, and you don’t really need a lot of your frontal lobe to survive.
